Perfectionism and the "Good Enough" gauge

The problem with perfectionism is NOT the inability to be satisfied -- although that can be frustrating.

The problem with perfectionism is NOT the unwillingness to start things because you could never do it well enough -- although that's terribly deblitating.

The problem with perfectionism is NOT the cutting yourself off from everyone and everything that is not perfect, since nothing is -- although that is so destructive.

No, the problem with perfectionism is not having the ability to judge good enough.

We all have an inbuilt gauge of what is good enough. Call it the sufficient gland, or the appropriate gauge, the satisfactory meter, or the acceptable index or whatever. Is 75% good enough, 65%? 90%, 10%?

Many people have a fairly well calibrated acceptable index. The rest of us envy them. Some peoples' gauges, are clearly set far too low, and we are all annoyed with those people. And other peoples' are set annoyingly high.

But with perfectionists, the gauge is pegged at the top, full-on all the time. There is no variation, it never reads anything different so it is USELESS, leaving that person with NO GAUGE of 'good enough' AT ALL.

You either stupidly stare at the gauge, and everything will always fall below the topped out meter, so nothing is ever good enough, or, with awareness of the malfunction, you ignore the gauge and have to GUESS what is satisfactory with no guide or ruler at all. It makes it really, really, REALLY hard to judge anything in any part of your day, in any part of your life.

How many flaws can i allow in someone i'm dating? Is alcoholism too much? My 'good enough' gauge is pegged so i'm in the dark. When can i stop working so people will think i've done enough. How many times do i need to re-edit that piece about perfectionism that i wrote before i can show it to someone. And on and on.